Mad Men Party Canapés (Betty and Joan would approve)

Please, do not host a Mad Men viewing party. Terrible idea. Watching Mad Men is like reading a brilliant book; you savour every line, become mesmerised by the poignant storyline, and everything else around you fades away. The experience doesn't benefit from someone wedged on the sofa next to you, gnashing snacks and shouting out observations over the dialogue.

I watch it alone, in a dimly lit room. Just me and some beautifully damaged characters, trying to find our way in this crazy world... some of us a little drunker than others.

So, no, I won't be attending any giddy gatherings the night the new season debuts here in the UK. I can't abide all the silliness that's sprung up around the show recently — retro costumes, wacky internet videos. I'm not a kill-joy but this isn't Beach Blanket Bingo people. Mad Men is not goofy. The wackiest thing that ever happened on it involved a run-away riding lawnmower and (spoiler alert) that did not end well.

But the day aprés episode I can't wait to get social about Don Draper and company, and this is when a Mad Men party is ideal. Invite some fellow fans over and serve up retro cocktails and canapés to compliment the era you're all engaged in.

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